Жизнь Экспатрианта

7/1 10:55 Moscow time

Here I sit once again at a desk in our Moscow office. A VIP from Germany is here; turns out the very one that I had to convince, via telephone (his being a mobile) back in January of my Russian skills to get this position. Whatever he told my (now) boss must have been sufficient, so as far as I'm concerned, he's a great guy. Certainly, my skills in the language now are light years beyond where they were when we first talked (him: "garble garble static на русском языке?"; me: "... .... umm... три лет... на umm.. за... пять год... через..."; and so forth). He seems fairly decent, having now met him in the flesh. He's been sort of one of the driving influences towards our presence here, so was quite interested in hearing my perspective on the situation.

Our flight out of Кольцово was early, but otherwise mainly painless -- except for a bit of excitement when we realized that the airport had neglected to announce the beginning and middle of boarding for our flight, and had saved the PA for the "final boarding call". A little sprint first thing in the morning does wonders for you. We flew out this time on a fairly new AirBus plane. The interior was a hundred times nicer than any of the domestic models, though I was slightly disappointed that, in the event of an unexpected dogfight, we would have been completely unable to defend ourselves. Ahh.. Russia aviation... On the other hand, it's worth mentioning that I have never flown with such consistently skilled pilots. The takeoffs are comforatble, the rides smooth, and on landings, the plane barely shudders (as opposed to the rolling bounces I'm accustomed to from US carriers). Aeroflot claims to have the best-trained pilots in the industry -- I'd believe it at this point.

I won't be back at Шереметьево again until my next trip in August/September. We're flying out of Moscow from an airport to the south of the city, called Домодедово (Domodedovo). Since I've had consistently painful experiences at Шереметьево -- as has everyone else who's ever flow there -- I'm curious to see what the other big Moscow airport is like. Our flight for Khabarovsk leaves at around 6:15 PM today (Moscow time), and lands at something like 9 AM (Khabarovsk time). Per my Handy-Dandy World Clock, I see that there is 7 hours' time difference between the two; meaning (6+9-7...) this will be an 8-hour flight. Per Company policy, it will be business class. We'll see what that means on a domestic Russian carrier...

Regardless, I may or may not be in any type of contact with the outside world for the next bunch of hours. Once again, I beg your indulgence, and will continue my devious practice of posting and backdating throughout.

6/30 23:05 Yekaterinburg time (10:05 Portland time)

Reading over my first impressions of this place is pretty embarrassing. I’ll try to excuse them by saying how tired I was and generally gloomed by the reception we got from the Moscow dealers – plus the fact that I was only just then reaching the halfway point of my time away from home and family; and that it already seemed like forever had passed. Regardless, as the Iron Rule clearly states: what has been written can not be unwritten (I know this for a fact because I made the Rule up myself just now), and besides, the whole point of this thing is to record my experiences. If I was interested in recording facts, I would have done some research beforehand or maybe at least looked at a book or two. So.

Today was by far the best day we’ve had here. We all got an early start on the training, which went smoothly and filled the whole day. I also got a phone call from A, G, and Z, which was very nice after a full 48 hours without. The weather today was hot (30C) but the humidity wasn’t too terrible, and the dealership folks were engaged enough that the day flew by. Then, the really good stuff began.

С А doesn’t live very near the hotel, so asked one of his mechanics, who does, to give С П and I a ride back. The mechanic, Г Г, turned off the highway about five miles outside of town, down a paved forest road, explaining that by doing this we would avoid the city traffic. No problem; I figured I’d get a few shots of the forest (which I did; posting pending...). He stopped, I got out to take pictures, and he asked if С П (who’s never been to visit Yekaterinburg, either) and I wanted to see the spot in the forest where the bodies of Tsar Nicholas II and his family were dissolved in acid and ‘buried’ – which was fairly nearby. It turns out that Yekaterinburg is where they were taken and actually killed, and the Communists were doing pretty messed-up things right from the get-go. Of course, we said emphatically yes.

So, we drove a ways into the forest, past some smaller villages, which, though themselves no beauties, were much nicer, in my opinion, than the dingy, run-down Soviet monstrosities in the cities. Down through the forest, to a tall fence made of poles. We got out of the car, and walked through a log-cabin type entry gate into the monastery that sits on the grave lands. The monastery was founded only a handful of years ago, and is still being built by the monks. In the way of monks, this particular group has assumed responsibility for the murders on behalf of all Russians, and works to atone. I took minimal pictures here, since it really didn’t seem appropriate in most places.

Afterwards, we came back to the city through the countryside. In appreciation for the detour, С П and I invited Г Г to dinner. During our chat at dinner, I asked if the spot the actual murders took place was similarly accessible. “Of course,” I was told – in fact, according to С П, we drove past it on the way back from the sauna and I even commented on it... ahh... vodka versus short-term memory; see who wins.

Anyway, there is now a cathedral (actually, two cathedrals and a sort of log house monument – but we’re not sure what those are for), also less than ten years old, on the spot the murders took place, overlooking the city. In keeping with the apparent Russian mindset, there is a very impressive sculpture in front of Nicholas and his family, along with an inscription in old church Russian that means (roughly – even С П wasn’t quite able to make it all out) “Their blood was spilled by / for all of Russia”. The by/for word actually sort of means both in the poetic sense it was used. This one is probably the most impressive church I’ve seen here so far.

Anyway, here I am typing away when I should be sleeping. I need to get up tomorrow morning at 3:30 to be ready to eat at 4:30 (Russians don’t think you civilized if you can’t have at least a two-course breakfast, three course lunch, and four course dinner), and to head to the airport (Кальцово – I checked a street sign) for a 6:50 flight back to Шереметьево. Probably, I’ll write again in the airport; otherwise, back at the Moscow office before our ~6PM flight to Khabarovsk.

6/29 23:10 Yekaterinburg time

The end of another useful day. С П and I spent the first half of the day teaching schematic-reading and basic electrical problem solving to the group of techs shuttled in from as much as 200 miles away. Then the second half we spent doing actual diagnoses at the service center. The level of motivation here is the highest I’ve seen since the first dealer (all of two weeks ago...); I couldn’t be more pleased.

In the middle of the afternoon, clouds rolled in from Asia, and began a glorious lightning-and-rain storm that lasted for about two hours and flooded everything. Some four hours later, the ground was pretty much dry, and the sky mainly clear, lightly spotted with clouds. Being on high ground helps quite a bit, I suppose.

The forests in this area are pretty unlike anything I’ve seen before. They appear to be mainly a mix of beech trees and a type of fir that looks like the bark has been stripped off its upper half. С П tells me the bark stays light brown colored, and quite thin, until it it ten or so years old. Regardless, seeing a white-and-light-brown colored forest is pretty neat.

What’s less neat, however, is the local mosquitoes. Since Peterburg, it seems like I’ve had at least one bite going at all times. The really crappy part is that the bites of the bugs here don’t particularly sting; rather, they hurt, sort of like wasp venom – not a burning or stinging, but more of an intense, localized... pain. I’m fairly confident that I haven’t caught any kinds of exotic asian diseases from them, though, so I guess that’s good.

I managed to take a couple-hour stroll this evening in the city area around the hotel. Doing so, I realized just how different are the visual cues identifying shops versus residential buildings, etc. Since most of the city is Soviet-designed, the shops are spaces taken out of residences, and all the residences look the same – like a cross between housing projects and college dormitories. This is with the exception of the ‘other’ residences (I’m not sure if these are nicer, or less nice) scattered throughout the city: single- or perhaps as many as four-room wood cabin-type things constructed in what I would otherwise have assumed were parks. As far as I can tell, not much formalized commerce goes on in those areas.

I did on my stroll finally find a shop and manage to start accumulating the Christmas gifts I’d been planning on getting while here. Also, I managed to put up a lot of flyers – the authorities here seem to be disinterested in, rather than opposed to the posting of flyers; the ones I put up have a lot of company.

Finally, one neat item: on my walk, I passed a billboard for a furniture store. On it was a picture of a cat stretched out, eyes closed on a white couch. A Russian Blue. Looked exactly like our cat, even down to the claws not being fully retracted and the dopey ‘pet me’ look on its face. Of course I didn’t bring my camera with me; maybe (unlikely) I’ll get a chance to get a shot of it before I leave now that I know to look for it.

6/29 11:22 Yekaterinburg time

Argh. I am so destroyed this morning. I meant to write last night after the ‘sauna’, but since С П and I didn’t get back to the hotel until around 2:30 in the morning, and since the full Russian sauna experience includes consumption of massive amounts of food and vodka (with beer for chasers and for after you feel you’ve had enough vodka), I ‘elected’ to hold off writing until morning. I slept well, but am still way tired, since morning started only four or so hours after I crashed. Thank goodness for my inherited resistance to hangovers, or I would be completely non-functional today.

Anyway. The evening began with С П and I dashing back to the hotel to grab our swimming suits, then heading out to the service center. About seven people ended up being there, including the two of us and С А. Change (or strip down), wrap a sheet around your lower half, and into the sauna. This place is less than six months old; all done in wood on the inside – as, I suppose, you might expect – except for the kiln-type coals-holding region. The heat has completely blackened the wood on the ceiling directly above the coals, and has at least singed every board in the place. There is only enough room for three people to sit, with some space between, on the upper deck, though four were squeezed in from time to time. Also, on the wall is a thermometer. С П and I got the privilege of going in first, along with С А, since he manages the service center, and so the sauna is basically his. After getting settled in, С П, who was sitting next to the thermometer, announced that it was 95 degrees (that’s ‘Celsius’, as opposed to ‘Reasonable’; over the course of the evening it tended around 93, swinging as high as 99 and as low as 90). Good deal, I guess. It was hot enough that the charms on my necklace, if they swung back and forth would burn me when they touched – a problem I solved by spinning them around to my back, where my skin would act as a gradual heat sink. The chain, though small, became an issue, too, until I pulled it tight against the front of my neck. Unfortunately for С П, I discovered this remediation method a bit late, and his cross, being much thicker than my charms, had to be removed.

Once we had all gotten fairly situated and sweaty – there is no way, in my opinion, to be ‘comfortable’ in something like that – С А started to throw dippers of water, from a bucket lying on the footboards of the upper deck, onto the coals. Whatever cooling effect the water had, the blast of hot steam accompanying each dipper throw more than made up for it. We spent a good piece of time (the heat wrecked my ability to estimate just how long) in there, then straight out and jump into the pool next to it. I had dipped my hand in the pool earlier that day; the water was chilly even without superheated skin. As we did it, it certainly woke you up. Paddle around in the pool, remarking how nice it was, then up and back into the sauna. Then back into the pool. Etc. I was told that I need to come back in the winter, so it can be done the right way: Sauna, then out into the snow, then back to the sauna, repeat. I also got to try the birch branches thing. The branches soak in a eucalyptus bath. When someone is ready, a companion pulls out a bundle of them, shakes them to fluff the leaves, and proceeds to whack him on the back, stomach, and legs. It is unbelievable how much hotter this makes the sauna; the combination of the tactile stimulation, along with the general tingliness you get from eucalyptus oil pushes the heat to the point of unbearable. Then you go straight to the pool before the sensitivity wears off.

We did four reps, then discovered that the beginnings of dinner had been laid out. So, we sat at the big table in another room and munched on various Russian foods. And started to drink vodka. The process was something like this: everyone at the table has an empty glass, and we sit and chat until someone gets an idea for a good toast. Then, everyone’s glass is poured (I’m guessing about a double-shot quantity; 100 grams or so), the toast is made, everyone clicks with everyone else (this starts to take longer than the toast itself, after a couple are down) and we all drink to the bottom. Repeat. As has been observed by pretty much everyone with me (even С П, who doesn’t drink), my russian gets quicker and better as the distraction of sobriety is lifted. This evening was no exception. I even took a shot at toasting, and was very well received.

After munching, chatting, and drinking for a bit, back to the sauna. Then pool, then sauna, and so on. At a couple of points, I went out onto the front deck of the lodge. A wind was kicking up, the temperature was great (or so my sauna-and-pool-abused skin told me) and you could smell the woods scant yards from the deck.

Dinner was пельмены (those mini-kuldunas things I had my first night in Russia) just grabbed out of a big common bowl, and, of course, more vodka. After everyone had managed to much a bit, the last element of the night was brought up. Singing. This is apparently either a main Russian sauna or drinking tradition (I never did get which). Of course, technology’s application to all elements of life showed itself here. The eating room was equipped with a Karaoke DVD set. So, we sat around, eating, drinking, and singing dozens of Russian songs (and whoever didn’t have the mike just sang that much louder) until the wee hours of the morning. This is also, in my opinion, really good practice for pronunciation and reading speed and accuracy.

С П drank nothing but juice, so was able to drive us safely back to the hotel. I requested, and was assured, that this will be the only time we do this until at least the weekend in Khabarovsk. I can only take so much, after all...

The guys we were hanging out with are most likely not crooks. Per С П, who took some time privately to clarify things for me, these dealers are most likely bankrolled by the Tatar organization as a means of money laundering and legitimate income. He’s indicated that in the bigger cities, the mafias tend to straighten out over time as they accumulate more legitimate organizations and derive more and more of their income via above-the-board means. So, in working to build these dealers, we are actually acting as a force in support of law and order. Or something. But ‘grey’ funding sure does aid your ability to party!

By the way – I checked, and С А’s car is a Nissan R’nessa (?!?)

6/28 14:39 Yekaterinburg time

Wow. Did I ever get this place wrong. After seeing more of the city, I will retract and amend my previous description. This region is like an equal combination of Detroit and Eugene, but with much more impressive scenery on the outskirts. The other significant difference here is the fact that the less picturesque buildings in Detroit and Eugene are in a state of decay, whereas the stuff here is in the process of being built or reconstructed. The pace of economic growth in this area must be insane.

С П and I started our day with C А (I’ve already talked to them about Russians’ need to come up with a few different names; it’s driving me nuts) at the main service center of our Yekaterinburg-based dealer. The place is located 40 or so km out of town, just off a conjunction of main highways running to Yekaterinburg, Chelyabisnk, Perm, and Tyumin, in an area that is, except for them, pretty much all forest for miles and miles around (I am told that this is not quite thick enough to qualify as ‘taiga’, but that it’s so close that it comes down to interpretation). You couldn’t ask for a better location. The place is enormous, and actively being expanded. For now, there is a huge storage lot, as well as an equally big indoors, heated lot. Their service bays area is big, well equipped, clean, and well lit. They have facilities for truck washing, as well as factory-quality paint of bodies and chassis. Out back, they are in the process of finishing up a lodge for truckers, and are planning to put in fueling areas, etc, to be a proper truck stop. I’m told this will be one of the first such in all of Russia.

All of this they’ve constructed in just over a year. Commenting to С П on this, I was told that, per his ‘spies’, this dealer is owned by a group of Tatars that are/were big time into organized crime. Woo-hoo. That does explain why they seem to have so much money. Politeness engines have been set to warp factor nine... We’ve been invited to try out the sauna in the truck stop lodge this evening. I am told this will involve the Russian tradition of whacking one’s own bare skin with birch branches. What the heck, I came half way around the globe to get a chance to try just this sort of cultural thing; how can I say no?

Right now, we’re over at their main sales lot starting training for a big pack of guys – they brought in foreman from all their shops; as far away as Magnetogorsk, Surgut, and Kurgan. It’s in the middle of the city; yet has no restroom. They have instead, the “woods” in one corner of their sales lot, consisting of a bunch of big weeds. So, just moments ago, the resemblance to Detroit got even stronger as I peed outside, on asphalt in a paved corner, with traffic rushing by scant yards away. Ahh... the Russian experience!

As a final comment, I was expecting to have serious language difficulties out here, given my experience with ‘countryside’ types in the US. The guys out here are just the opposite. In general, they speak slowly, clearly, and loudly. It’s wonderful.

6/27 22:36 Yekaterinburg time

So.. Here I sit in a large, but nevertheless accurately describable as “crappy” hotel room in the middle-south of Russia. The flight out was not as bad as I expected; the views were fairly decent, and С П was able to stick his legs out into the aisle so I could put my legs diagonally into his seat’s foot space. We took a TU-134 (Аэрофлот, grey-colored) out here. I was delighted to see that our aircraft had a glass bubble on the very front for a nose gunner -- ‘just in case’, I must presume. Neither machinegun nor gunner was evident, though.

The Yekaterinburg airport was small, old, and terribly run down. A lady tried to charge me 10 roubles to pee in the (presumably) public toilet. At the airport, we met С А, the service manager for our dealer out here. His car is a Nissan, of a brand not found in the US (I’ll try to get the name tomorrow), and is internally marked in Chinese. To make it even more interesting, the steering wheel is on the right-hand side of the car! Russia seems pretty much okay with whatever configuration of vehicle you drive; still, in the big cities further east, you almost never see the wrong-hand drive stuff. Here, on the ride from the airport to our hotel (on Moscow Hill; called the Moscow Hill Hotel) my spot audit of non-domestic cars passing us came up with about a 50/50 mix of handedness. It must be quite exciting to drive sitting next to the curb all the time.

After chatting with С А a bit on the way out, and seeing the city a bit, I have decided that Yekaterinburg is basically identical to Detroit. It is heavily industrial, quite large (third largest in all of Russia, they tell me), and, outside of the industrial areas and not-terribly-impressive downtown, surrounded mainly by beat-up residential zones as far as the eye can see. I’ll try to get some pictures with cyrillic signs in them so you can tell they were taken in Russia.

On the other hand, we are sitting about 50 km from the border between Europe and Asia. It’s just a hair more (or less) pointless than the spot in the US where you can stand in four states at once, but I’ll make an effort to go there because I am a doofus. The dealer we are meeting here is quite a huge enterprise, which should in itself be interesting.

One final note: on the way to the elevator to go to our rooms for the night, the security guy stopped С П and I and asked, quite plainly, “do you want a girl? [вы хотите девушку?]” – just like that. He assured us that we could put in an order and have one (or more) there within twenty minutes. Huhuh... No. I’m definitely making sure I stick close to С П around here; the crappiest parts of Moscow and Peterburg I went to seem much less disreputable than this place.

6/27 14:30 Moscow time

Here again at Шереметьево. This morning, J V and his wife, И took me around to some of Moscow’s better known parks. From one (I remember the name of none of them), to the south-west of the city center, you could hike up a hill and see basically the whole of Moscow spread out in front of you. Seven of the “Stalin” buildings (housing various ministries, except for two which are hotels, and one which is a university – so named for their look, and the fact that Stalin had them all built) are visible throughout the city, as are a few gold church domes. Apparently, in past times, a view of Moscow would have been full of such domes, but since the newer buildings are much higher than the standard church here, you don’t get that same effect anymore.

The other park we went to was the Victory Park, dedicated in 1995 for the fiftieth anniversary of Russia’s victory in WWII. Seeing it, I’ve revised my estimation of Russian monument-builders; the Soviets may not have been anything special in themselves, since even non-Soviet Russia makes one hell of a memorial. The park is huge; the buildings and memorials so large that you get vertigo standing at their base and looking up. Just amazing.

One other item of interest was the statue of Yuri Gagarin (first man in space). I never got close enough to really appreciate its size, but given the statues I did see, “collossal” might be a reasonable descriptor. What’s more, in a fit of creativity, the Soviets cast his statue out of pure titanium. It’s oxidized all to hell (as one might expect), but still... a freaking sixty-foot-tall statue of a person made out of pure titanium!!

6/27 08:21 Moscow time

A quick note:

I'm betting that posting will be tricky in Yekaterinburg, as I will almost certainly be without a LAN, and the only dialup numbers I have are Moscow (4 hours away by plane) and Saint-Peterburg (4.5 hours away by plane). In addition, the hotels there are on a 'cash-only' basis, so I am reluctant to add the cost of a long-distance call just to get on the Internet, when I will have only limited cash.

Nope, I'm saving my one call out of there for A to let her know I've arrived alright and to briefly chat with Z and G. I will, however, keep writing; simply saving the various posts until I get an opportunity to put them all up. This may occur if I get a few minutes at out Yekaterinburg dealer, and if not before, will certainly occur on Thursday (Moscow time)when, between flights from Yekaterinburg and to Khabarovsk, I will have an 8-hour day in our Moscow office.

As has become my custom, I will adjust the historical record by back-dating the posts I accumulate. If one were to, say, not come back here to look until Thursday (Portland time), one might never know I was out of contact...

Пока!

6/26 19:00 Moscow time

Unbelievable that I've already been here two weeks, but my flight in did land on a saturday at around this time. How the time does fly (in hindsight). Here's hoping the next two weeks go by just as quickly and I can get home before I know it.

С П is going to be away from home for the next three weeks, since one of our major suppliers is having a training session in Saint-Peterburg the week after I leave, and he will need to translate for them. So, he elected to get some stuff wrapped up this evening, and I had the time to myself to wander around the Sokol and Aeroport (nowhere near a real airport, btw) regions of Moscow. I offer here some more general observations about Moscow:

-Construction here relies heavily on cement. Even brand-new, major-high-rise, fancy, way-expensive buildings are basically 99% reinforced concrete with pretty siding. Not just the exterior, but most interior walls are concrete, too. While cheap (one must assume), this means that hanging pictures can be a major task, and running into corners will hurt you much, much more than the corner. The level of new construction taking place here is beyond impressive, but I can't get over how ugly the buildings are unless they are just about finished -- like multi-story versions of the pour-and-tilt-up modular "office parks" whose prevalence in Portland has increased somewhat over the past ten years.

-The cops around here (called 'militia') most seem to operate at a baseline level of crookedness. If you've done something actually wrong, you will have a hard time getting out of it; on the other hand, they have a tendency to go fishing at the margins of legality -- such as going against the (unmarked) direction of prevailing traffic in a parking lot -- for people who are willing just to pay them off and be on their way rather than argue; those who can argue in these minor cases, they tend to just let go in favor of easier catches. This seems really bad, but the fact is that basically everyone who spends much time here has a reasonably realistic view of the militia, and is much less inclined to automatically defer to them. It also sort of helps keep the cops, on the other hand, from getting too disrespectful of the people they are (ostensibly) serving. Even the arguments are nearly always civil.

-Politeness here, to the extent that I have been able to observe it, does not overlap much with the politeness I learned. More often than not, when I hold open a door or ask someone if they need a hand I get from them a much more specific awareness of my actions than I do at home. It's hard to describe. They react sort of the way I suppose I would in Portland if a cashier asked me how I was doing, and actually meant it -- the small, quasi-automatic rituals I've learned, which are unconsiously accepted by people at home, seem to be taken here as significant and genuine. Like I said, it's hard to describe.

-People walk a lot more here than in the US. They also eat a lot more here than in the US. They are also, on average, thinner than Americans. Since the diet here does not seem to correspond to any type of diet I've ever heard expounded in the States as healthy, I have to assume that the reason for the third, given the second, must be the first. They walk, a lot here. I've laid down at least three miles a day every day I've been here, and I'm not really doing all that much. Of course, the fact that owning a car is so impractical here has a number of downsides; it'll be interesting to see what this place looks like in 20 or so years, after the housing crunch has settled down some.

I have more, but I suppose I should save some for the post-trip wrap-up. After all, I've still got a dozen or so more days to go...

6/26 14:37 Moscow time

My second субботник (not including the flight from Portland as “work”, of course). The weather is calling for rain today in Moscow. The sky sure doesn’t look like it, but I’ve learned that the sky – as interpreted by me – isn’t the best gauge.

The city this morning was practically empty compared to the last week. It is screamingly obvious that this is a day off for most of the people here. The drive to this fourth dealer, which was an easy half hour or more the last two days, took just over five minutes today. This, with Н – who, though an experienced Moscow driver, is by no means one I’d describe as ‘Russian-style’ – driving. No one who was expected to show up today failed to do so, which is more than I was expecting. In fact, the shop foreman seemed fairly enthused about what we had to show him. And this on a day regularly taken off.

I have noticed that none of the dealers we’ve seen so far operates on the standard automotive-sales program of 24 hour staffing (if not active hours of operation). Have vehicle problems after 6PM on a Friday? Have your rig towed and parked in our lot – we’ll get to you Monday. Per С П, this is par for Russian business.

I notice that I’ve been slamming Russian business practices quite a bit lately. To counterbalance, let me offer the following additional observations:

- In general, the mechanics and foreman at the dealers I’ve been to have been both highly technically skilled, and also able to absorb and make use of new information at a rate which would be impressive in one person, but is nothing short of astounding when found “across the board”, as I’ve tended to see.
- In general, even the most impatient person I’ve come across has politely stopped whatever he was doing as soon as I started to try to communicate, and been attentive (and helpful, if I ask) and considerate of my efforts. Even when С П is around to say things better and quicker than I could, not a single person has cut me off, turned to him and asked “what the hell is he trying to say?”

6/26 00:27 Moscow time

Overcast today. This kept the afternoon metro hike from getting all sweaty like the last couple of days. Today was our second day at this fourth dealer. As with yesterday, the systems were perfectly willing, but for the most part the personnel were less so. I did, however, get a couple of names. А В is the service manager; А Ч the general manager; and О П and В З the parts managers. We basically spent the whole day with О П, training him. And as usual, the standard Russian version of customer service was on fine display. On at least three occasions, customers walked into the parts sales office where we were working, and had to wait for upwards of twenty minutes while the three parts counter guys finished chatting amongst themselves. It'd be unbelievable if I wasn't seeing it all the time, wherever I go. Certainly, I assure С П, the 80 years of having the market stomped out of the culture will be overcome in their own time. Maybe I'll still be around by the time it happens...

We got a ride back to the Metro after work today from А В. While a much less insane driver than the guy yesterday, a ride in his car is still more exciting than a car ride should be. Still, we made good time.

Then, after work, С П had arranged to meet and have dinner with some friends of his from the town he grew up in (between Samarkand and Bokhara in what is now Uzbekistan). This was nice, except for two things: The restaurant we chose was unbelievably loud, and one of his friends, Д, had a fairly soft voice; Secondly, the subject matter of conversation tended to be one for which I have nearly zero vocabulary. Still, all were quite considerate, and tried really hard to keep me involved, and by the time we were leaving, I was able to at least participate a bit and understand some.

Afterwards, I Metro'd back myself and got to walk for a bit in downtown Moscow alone after dark (back to the hotel, that is). Fun fun fun. Actually, my impression of the late-night foot traffic was much like when I used to find myself in downtown Portland at late hours -- they were more concerned for their own safety, seeing me on a dark street, than I was of them.

I get to sleep in again tomorrow morning, though a bit less than today. Then I leave Moscow, except for a brief stop-over, until late August / early September.

6/25 00:16 Moscow time

After today, I will have passed the halfway point between leaving home and leaving for home. As exciting and interesting as this has been; the downside has been major.

The second Moscow dealer is located much closer to my hotel. I get to sleep in a bit, in addition to my now-customary nap in the car on the way in. This one is a major car dealer, with franchsies for Ford, Chevrolet (the model, NIVA, sells about 100 units a month out of this franchise), Cadillac, Oldsmobile, GMC, as well as Lada, Opel, and soon to be Hummer. I have no idea why they want to get into trucks. Their truck facilities are better than those at any other dealer we've visited, but are basically the back of the yard by the crap-pile. They don't seem particularly motivated, like the last dealer, but at least all their equipment worked. By keeping my expectations super-low, I've been able to feel good about what С П and I accomplished today. Yet again, though, I failed to get even a single confirmed name-face match.

We got a ride back to the Metro station from a real Russian driver. 100 miles an hour down city streets in traffic most certainly not going 100 miles an hour. At one point, we got slowed behind a car, and had a bus in the next lane; the curb lane, next to the bus, looked fine, so the guy driveing gunned the gas, blazed around the bus, nearly hitting him, only to see a Militia car that had been hidden by the bus. We avoided hitting the cops without squealing the tires, but only barely. I'm not sure what the point is for lane markings in Russia -- maybe just to confuse foreigners. Even С П grabbed the chicken bar at one point. I just closed my eyes at some places and tried to enjoy the ride. If I get too used to this (and I notice that I am starting to anticipate traffic properly for Russia) I might not be safe to drive for a little while in

It turns out, Yekaterinburg is going to be a cash-only city (except for the expensive restaurants we will certainly be frequenting as the only we can patronize which accept the Company card). This means that the draft I was going to get before leaving, and didn't, turns out to have been necessary. Basically, J V is loaning me his own personal money to cover my hotel, and I'll figure out how to pay him back later. Have I mentioned what a great guy he is?

I was asked what I wanted to do on Sunday. I've pretty much seen the main points of Moscow building (including, this evening, the Lubyanka), so I asked to go out of town to see the Moscow countryside. The Russians were very impressed with my request, and from the muttered conversations, I get the impression the this will be a very good day.

6/23 22:47 Moscow time

Pretty hammered tonight.

В Е took me out to dinner tonight. A Bulgarian place (not that I could discern the difference between Bulgarian, Hungarian, or Unitarian food here, given the disparity between the Russian and American food 'baselines'). Between the two of us, we also had 3/4 liter of vodka -- split evenly, as it was drunk in toasts. As we've discovered, this helps both of us with our language skills. He spoke only English; I spoke only Russian, and we took turns correcting each other. This worked pretty well.

After dinner, we walked past the American Embassy to the Metro station, then I got to experience the Moscow "trolleybus" system the rest of the way to my hotel. No complaints.

As an additional bonus, I learned two more Russian swears -- that I'm not going to post, of course; what kind of person do you think I am?!?

Finally, it appears, after a conversation with my boss, that I will be electing to not receive emails again until I return to Portland. There is no way for me to get them in Moscow, and by the time I reach Yekaterinburg, I will have megs upon megs of crap (along with, of course, your valuable messages) to download. Since I would have to do this on a dial-up line, long-distance, the hotel phone bill would be insane. So, I am forgiven in advance by The Company for being unreachable by email for the balance of my trip. Joy.

On the other hand, those who are so privileged can try to reach me on my private email. So long as I have LAN access, I can get to this. Meaning, for certain Moscow, and less certain, the rest of the cities. Most important, I should be able to continue posting through the balance of my trip. Excessive joy.

I'm off to bed; I should sleep well tonight. See you tomorrow.

6/23 10:15 Moscow time

I likely won’t be getting my emails the whole week I’m in Moscow. Turns out (I discover after an hour on the phone with tech support last night) my ID is not one that generally gets access to the Company network over LAN – only dialup. Because of this, and because I am generally ignorant of things computerish, a critical program was not installed, and I can only get this program off the Company network. –sigh-

I’ll try, anyway, one last time in our Moscow office to hook up and so save myself the six hours it will certainly take on a dial-up to download everything I’ve accumulated in a week.

It ended up only sprinkling a bit yesterday evening. Today, however, the sun and sky are completely hidden by clouds. Just a comfy Portland day (during nighttime in the real Portland).

This morning, on the way to Balashikha, I finally saw a member of the Anti-Flyer Forces in action, scraping away at the stuff pasted up overnight. I’m currently re-thinking my strategy. As of last night, though, the flyer I slipped into the glass case (which I was certain at the time would be removed immediately) was still there. There is certainly a logic to this; I must merely discover it.

For the second day in a row, I had an “American breakfast”, consisting of whatever I could grab and hold as I rushed out to the car. At least Н is okay with me eating in his rig.

14:37 Moscow time

Server problems abound. At this point, С П and I are left with having to write out instructions for how to load, install, and use the various applications. Very, very frustrating.

On the other hand, a breeze has kicked up, the sun has yet to show itself, and the weather, therefore, is superb.

One of the items our dealers need to have is called a datalink adaptor. It’s a little gizmo that lies between cables running from a diagnostic port on a truck to the back of a laptop. It comes in a kit with the requisite cables, and runs about $600. The guys at this dealership asked if they could borrow mine for the day. No problem, I think. Next thing I know, they’ve got it pulled apart and are analyzing the various magic rocks mounted on the wafer inside. It became immediately clear that they intend to bootleg a copy for themselves out of local components. More power to them, I say – you can’t fault their confidence.

Bootlegging appears to be a major industry here. I saw last week in a store a DVD copy of Shrek 2 (which, if I recall correctly, came out in theaters a week or so ago). The nuclear weapons book is more of a niche item (compared to major motion pictures, of course), so I’m not terribly worried about massive bootlegging of it; it remains, however, a legitimate concern for information-based businesses in Russia.

As I calculated at dinner tonight...

6/22 10:32 Moscow time

Please go to see my New Pictures. My camera is acting up and I fear I have lost all my pictures of the summer palace. So, I may not be able to post much more in the way of photos. Be forewarned; these might have to last you...

Some time after I wrote the last post, the management showed up at the dealership, and we were able to pull off a fairly non-worthless session at the end of the day. This evening, I was entertained by М Ч. Since Н was working elsewhere this afternoon, С П and I took the Metro back from the dealership to our Moscow office. Them М Ч and I took it again to dinner, at a German restaurant (of all places!) in a suburb of Moscow. Then we wnet back to the Metro station, he pointed me to the train that would take me to the station in which I could switch to the train that would take me to within two miles of the hotel. All this dragging around my laptop, briefcase, and camera, and wearing a suit and tie. Yecch. And I just did laundry.

Tomorrow we wrap up at the first dealer. I can look through my notes, and see that we did actually accomplish things, but it sure doesn't feel like it.

6/22 12:13 Moscow time

So, here I am, sitting at the dealership with С П for the past three hours, waiting for the service manager to show up. They say that he’s having a new laptop purchased with legitimate software loaded for use in the shop. Once he gets here, we’ll see how that goes. Right now, I’ve screwed around with the non-portable computers and gotten all our various applications to work on them. This was complete two hours ago. Boredom drives me to fire up my own laptop and write.

According to С П (who is also getting irritated by our being stood up) this is just another example of poor Russian service in action. As he puts it, “No consideration for making people feel comfortable.” Hopefully, this condition is concentrated in Moscow; we hardly saw it at all in Peterburg.

This morning, Н and I chatted for most of the 45-minute drive to С П’s place. H is a native Muscovite, and old enough to remember quite well the Soviet times. He’s also been a student of languages, so he knows a bit of English and also knows to speak slowly, clearly, and using relatively simple words and basic constructions. It’s like a daily private tutoring session with a history professor / tour guide. And it turns out, he isn’t even really part of the program. The dealers are supposed to provide our transport to and from, but if we relied on these guys (and apparently we can expect the same from the second Moscow dealer; but the Yekaterinburg guys have already started calling, wanting to know if there’s anything we need that they have ready for us when we arrive; it must just be Moscow...) we’d be getting in sometime after noon. H is basically just an ‘as-available’ bonus. This morning, we went by the main campus of Moscow State University, and through some of the industrial areas more recently annexed into the city proper. I had pointed out to me the state Duma building, and the road leading to Stalin’s dacha (which was in the countryside in his day, but has by now been absorbed by the city). After picking up С П, we hit the outer ring road (I disremember the name) and went a chunk of the way around the periphery of Moscow – in fairly light traffic. Outside of the city, the land is more hilly than I would have expected. The terrain is a mix of forests, meadows, lakes, and a few bogs. People have dachas out that way, but for the most part, it’s inhabited only by animals until one reaches a village or population center. The in-between is quite empty here; and this is the heavily populated region of Russia. I can’t wait to get actually out into the boonies.

It started out sunny today, got hot (nearly 30 C, according to the thermometers), then the clouds rolled in, and it looks now like we’ll see rain before sundown. The humidity here is high, which makes the heat worse, and the cool breezes a thousand times better. I saw a squirrel in on of the parks on my wandering around yesterday. Russian squirrels have long, pointy dark ears, and not terribly bushy tails, but are otherwise the same type of critters our cats like to watch run up and down our walnut tree. It was a city dweller, so knew well enough to stay clear of me, but wasn’t frightened into disappearing completely.

Also, I made a point, in Peterburg, of checking back with the flyers I left to see how long they lasted. The record was three days, in a fairly-well trafficked area. On my stroll, I checked the flyers I put up last Sunday. Two are still up; in fact, one of them (at a bus stop) was being perused closely by a middle-aged gentleman when I came by. I’m making notes of what works and what doesn’t... Maybe I can write a book when I get back – “The Secrets of Successful Unsolicited Advertising in Russian Cities”.

Yeah, right...

6/21 18:30 Moscow time

I’m back pretty early. This looks like the way it will be this week, as the Moscow dealers are definitely not as amiable (though still decent enough) as the Peterburg ones. We have to cut out as pretty much the time the workday ends ~5PM. I’m also on my own for a couple of evenings, as С П, living here, has stuff to do at home. What ever shall I do?

As it turns out, I am a major retard (I know, I’m the only one surprised...). The reason I couldn’t connect through the hotel LAN was ---- because it isn’t free! And you have to ask the front desk to turn it on! Who knew?!? So... I’m now up and running at massive speeds through the rest of this week. I’ll be putting up a ton of pictures, as I am uncertain that I will have this opportunity again before I get back to the states. Ahh.... fast Internet...

So. Н, the driver for our Moscow office, picked me up this morning, and we had a nice chat on the way in. My Russian must be getting pretty good, because I think I held my own fairly well, and once we got to speed, wasn’t aware of needing to ‘translate’ in my head. I still am confident that my vocabulary is way, way small; but Russian is a language of many prefixes and suffixes, and that helps a lot – particularly when I construct a new word properly.

I’d not have though it possible, but this first Moscow (actually, Балашихо [Balashikho] – just south and slightly west of the city proper) dealer has infrastructure that sucks worse than the last one. They have two “shop” laptops – one of which is riddled with viruses, and is running a pirated (called чёрный – ‘black’) version of Windows 2000 Home Edition; the other of which is clean, but running a pirated version of Professional Edition. Of course, with neither computer can they simply go to Microsoft’s home page and download the various service packs and patches to accommodate the many bugs that grace Microsoft products. So – we fought with the systems (at a whopping 10 kbps maximum) for pretty much the whole day. No training, no auditing, barely a stroll around the premises. I only got two names, and I’m not sure which went with who. Tomorrow should be better....

At the same time, their location is excellent, 200m off Entusiastvo Way (not the real words, but we discussed on the way home the most likely translation, and settled on ‘way’) – a major transit road between Moscow and the next big population center. They have good signage off the road. Their security is also pretty good, even by Russian standards. They have the standard solid exterior gate, along with two levels of interior gates and lesser offices before you get to the service center and storage lot. These have dogs (of course), cameras, and security guards. But, at this dealer, the guards get to spend the night in a watchtower located at one corner of the yard. We went up, and truly, from there, you can see the whole perimeter.

We had dinner at a ‘house’-type structure about 1 km behind the compound. It was staffed by a single lady, and served your choice of two soups, three dishes, and two garnishes (generally sold separately in Russia). The food was decent (I’m getting spoiled here; it was probably sublime), and the total for the full three courses, plus bread, plus drinks for С П and myself was 160r – about US$5.25.

I neglected to mention previously: At Pulkovo (airport (Saint-Peterburg)), our baggage was over the weight limit by about 10kg (probably mostly that book I got from И Ю). The ticket lady indicated that the additional cost would be 1% of our ticket values times the number of kilos over (which came to about 1200r) “or”. Of course, we selected “or”, gave her a hundred rouble bill -- which she pocketed, and were on our way. С П indicated that this is the customary way of communicating that one is willing to do business “на левая”, or ‘on the left’, and that I should always pay attention for the hanging “or”. So noted.

-------------------------------

6/21 22:00 Moscow time

...and then the hotel’s network went down. Right before I was ready to post and quit. Grr....

So, I went out and walked the quasi-residential streets (and parks) for a couple hours. This time of year, for two weeks, the weather heats up, and one of the types of trees (i can’t remember the name) produces a white fuzz that blows off in the wind. It’s similar to dandelion fluff, but much less horrible in consequence, and a lot closer to synthetic pillow stuffing in consistency. Anyway, we are smack in the middle of the two weeks. When a breeze blows, or anytime on a busy street, it looks like a blizzard. The stuff is called пуфк (‘poofk’ – sometimes a word is so good, you know you’ll never forget it; this is one such word), and it collects, again like snow, into drifts in corners and entryways. In some places, the пуфк-balls are easily a foot deep.

On an additional note, the sun has gone down at only 22:15. What has the world come to?

They tell me the server will be back up by the middle of tomorrow, so I’ll post this then (but backdate it, of course. Heh heh heh...)

6/21 09:52 Moscow time

They’ve downgraded today to only 23-26 degrees C. Some improvement, though it disinclines me to trust Russian meteorologists. Moscow is sunny this morning, with a dusting of high clouds near the horizons. Traffic was light; it only took about 20 minutes to make the 40km drive to our Moscow office. I’m right now waiting for the office IT guy to register my laptop onto their proxy server so I can get my emails and get onto the Internet (knock on wood) to post this and the last two I’ve written. If not, maybe I’ll have a big pile to put up in a week. And I’ll be less likely to be able to get much email, since the longer I go without synchronizing, the longer the initial download will be, and the greater my chances of not being able to get to it.

At the main office, I’ve met everyone (now that I’m here on a workday). At this moment, С П and I are waiting to hear from the first Moscow dealer that they are ready for us to come over. We hope to wrap today up quickly, as the Moscow dealers are not as chatty as the Peterburg ones.

6/20 23:56 Moscow time

I’m back. Moscow is supposed to get to 37 degrees C tomorrow. Welcome back, I guess...

I had a great ride back. I was able to converse with Н, our driver, in Russian the whole way back. I understood around 95% of his side of the conversation, and only had to ask for two words from С П. Н commented on how well I was doing after only a week’s worth of study. I totally agree; I rock.

I’m back in the same hotel I stayed in for my first night in Russia. I’ve called A, and spent the last half-hour trying to get the damned LAN they provide in the room to work with my computer. I’m not a computer person, so I am both:

-Convinced the problem is one easily fixable
-Equally convinced that there is no way I am going to figure out this easy method.

What really torques me, is that I wrote down some instructions for reconfiguring LAN setting at the second dealership on Thursday. Now, I can’t find the scrap of paper I wrote them on. Hopefully, at our Moscow office tomorrow morning will be someone who is much more knowledgeable than me about such things. All I know is that the light on the back of my computer next to the LAN port is on, and the computer says I am connected, but nothing is ‘received’.

Screw it, I’m going to bed.

6/20 19:45 Saint-Peterburg time

Аэропорт Пулково. Waiting for our flight back to Moscow.

Today was an interesting day... I was incorrect about our destination today. We got on a boat and went out the Neva, across part of the Bay of Finland, to the Summer Palace (Петергоф). Many, many pictures (by my standard) were taken. We spent more than five hours walking the ground without ever actually going into a single building, or seeing the whole grounds. It’s unbelievable. I did manage to go walking in the Bay of Finland, in the Baltic Sea – one more down, only a dozen more to go. The palace is more ornate than anything in the actual environs of S-P. Hundreds of gold-leaf-on-bronze statues, and more than 80 fountains – all apparently ‘powered’ without the use of pumps, as the palace ground sit on a natural springs, and use the springs’ pressure to drive the ornamentation. As I mentioned, I took a lot of pictures; once I get to a reliable line, I’ll start posting them.

For lunch, I had fillet of bear in cranberry sauce (nothing at all like the stuff on thanksgiving). How can you pick anything else when something like that is on the menu??

On the boat back, we started up a conversation with a pack of American tourists – consisting of three adults and six teenager types. It was surprisingly pleasant; and they had gotten a radically different view of Russia than I had. Mainly, I suspect, this is because they speak no Russian (as if I do! but at least I have С П for day-to-day stuff) and because, as I may have already commented, the concept of “customer service” is apparently completely outside the (current) Russian character. My most surprising example of this was yesterday at А Л’s sales lot. A bunch of Uzbeks came in and started looking at his trucks. Turns out they really want to buy a fleet of five, with trailers. This is a major sale for А Л. But he was at his dacha. The Uzbeks even came to me to try to buy the trucks, and persisted after it became obvious that I was not on the dealership staff. However, when they came into the “office” to talk to П В, А М, or whoever would talk to them, they were basically told to come back on Monday, then shown the door. I was floored, and C П took this as an opportunity for another ‘ignorant Russians’ rant (in English, to me, of course...). For once, I had to completely agree with him. Who ever heard of a used vehicles dealer telling a customer to come back later?!?

Anyway, the American family wanted to know the name of a good restaurant, so of course – Кавказ... We took them out there, had some tea, and grabbed a taxi to the airport. Where I am now.

6/19 23:41 Saint-Peterburg time

Today was a total cluster-f...

To start with, I woke up this morning way tired (probably from trying to get more sleep than I have gotten accustomed to); spoke quickly with A, showered, set my laptop up to pull my emails off the Company server, set the alarm on my Russian cell, and passed out on the floor for ? hour. That only helped a little. П В picked С П and I up from the hotel, and took us to the shop / sales lot portion of the dealership. It wasn’t as bad as I had expected, but still pretty third-world-industrial in its scope.

So, first things first, we tried to set up the main workshop computer to be able, over dial-up, to work with the main Company applications. Grr- turns out the computer doesn’t have Acrobat (who in the world doesn’t have Acrobat yet?!?), and we have to download it. Over a 3 Kbps connection. So, we figured we’d get a better signal off П В’s cell phone, which is capable to linking to StarNet, a Russian mobile Internet doohickey. But first, we have to get drivers (over the aforementioned slow connection). We fight with this for nearly an hour before getting it set up. Then we download Acrobat, getting cut off every time someone calls П В’s cell – which is about every five minutes. Then, it turns out that the computer in question also lacks WinZip – to open the Acrobat download install file. So. By 2 in the afternoon, we finally have the single computer set up. This was supposed to take about fifteen minutes...

Then, I go out to try out the diagnostic programs I loaded onto the dealer’s workshop laptop. No go. Can’t figure out why. After three tries, I figured, screw this..., and shifted to my laptop to demonstrate.

At this point, С П and I figured we should really be getting back to the main office to go over warranty coverage and claims procedures with the service manager (С П-ов). П В and parts manager А М discuss for a few minutes, make a couple of phone calls, and discover that the people with keys and access codes to the office all went to their respective dachas for the weekend (oh? is it Saturday? I hadn’t noticed...) and are unreachable.

At this point, we figure the parts guy is good enough to train, and since П В still has a lot of questions, we figured we’d come back to the business center at our hotel to wrap up training. Turns out (after we get there and get set up) that for whatever reason, the business center computers won’t access our network hardly at all. I ended up giving a paper and pen (and Russian/English dictionary) lesson on warranty and claims to a very patient A M, and С П taught using sketches a more advanced version of schematic reading and use in troubleshooting. After a couple of hours, we figured we’d done all we could and decided to invite the dealer guys out to a Ukrainian place on the Company dime. At this point, the evening improved significantly. The food here was just as excellent as in the Kavkaz place. I had veal that seemed to have been lightly smoked(? it was very good...) along with the other three courses that seem to be standard in Russian meals -- salad, закуски (I’m not sure what this means – it’s significantly more substantial than an appetizer, though), and soup. Then С П and I strolled a bit more through town and discussed our plans for tomorrow. Looks like we’ll make an early start to avoid the lines and check out the fortress in the fork of the Neva.

This is my last night in Saint-Peterburg (at least until my next trip up this way). I am greatly impressed with the city, and would recommend it to anyone. Guaranteed, when I finally get to bring A out to this side of the planet for vacation, we’re going to spend most of our time here (you can’t skip Moscow if you’ve never been, but a couple of days there would certainly do it – Peterburg can keep your attention for a long, long time).

More when I get to Moscow (hopefully... we’ll see if I can get a reliable Internet connection this time...)

6/19 00:03 Saint-Peterburg time

After my last posting (and a bit of time spent working on the beast of a report I'm going to have to submit when I get home), C П and I took the S-P Metro to the north side of the Neva. According to him, the Metro here is the deepest in the world. Having now ridden the escalator down (which is steeper than a standard American escalator, moves at about the same speed, and is a three-minute ride to the bottom!) two times now, I am inclined to believe him. I've ridden foreign public transport now in Japan, Mexico, and Russia. Without a doubt, Russia is the easiest to navigate. Reaching the bottom of the escalators, you see signs pointing to each track and listing the stop, in order, that the trains on that track will hit. Then, once you get onto a train, each station has it's name written in big, easy-to-read letters a few times along the train track walls. This means that you can completely miss the station announcements, and still know exactly where you are just by looking out the window at the stop. The trains are quite old, so nothing really to look at, and the ride is less than comfortable; on the other hand, the stations are generally clean and filled with intricate artwork. Not that one has much time to gawk, since the trains come every two minutes or so.

Anyway, on the other side of the Neva (actually, the Nevka -- S-P is on the Neva Delta, and only the southern branch of the first fork is called the Neva. Then each branch splits again, and finally, the Bolshaya (big) and Malenkaya (little) Neva and the Bolshaya and Malenkaya Nevka hit the Finland bay) we walked around a bit and ended up going over by the Cruiser Aurora (parked forever in Leningrad since 1948, according to the monument; say what you will about the Soviets, they were hard-core monument-builders...) which fired the first shots signalling the beginning of the Russian revolution. C П, asked for his thoughts on the proliferation of memorials to the great screwing over of his countrymen, said: Well, it's our history; maybe we just want to be a warning to the rest of the world... (To which I answered, "If Russians were capable of warning the world about anything, it would be the dangers of drinking" -- because that's the kind of thing I say.

Tomorrow is our last full day in S-P. I've already decided that there's no point in coming to Russia if you don't come here. C П agrees, and say sthat, since I've already been to the Kremlin, the rest of the trip is going to suck majorly compared to this first week.

I am 1/4 of the way done and home this next morning.

6/18 18:07 Saint Peterburg time

So, everyone wants to see more pictures. Here you go, then.

Back again to the second S-P dealer. I guess my Russian is at a high enough level that C П felt comfortable leaving me alone to work with the shop foreman, П В (who speaks even less English that I do Russian...). П В, a totally good-natured guy, speaks in a very 'blue collar' manner when he gets excited. Had I known at the time, I could have taken better notes and radically improved my ability to swear in Russian (to more than two words). Ah well, I'm working with him tomorrow, too... Suffice to say, my Handy-Dandy-Notebook entry for today is scratched out in the margins around dozens of attempted explanatory diagrams. How to say "Auxilliary transmission" in Russian? I found it only a bit painful simply to say коробка, then scratch out a sketch of just which one I was talking about. П В did the same on many an occasion. We ended blowing a whole day on something I was only planning a couple of hours for. On the other hand, П В ended up learning some critical skills -- like how to read schematics.

I'll get back to this again tonight, but I notice by the clock that A should be up by now and I'm going to take advantage of the brief window where we are both awake and on the same day to call her and wish a happy anniversary. I'll post some more at my regular unreasonably late hour...

6/18 01:21 Saint-Peterburg time

I woke up this morning thinking in Russian. It stopped as soon as it started, but it’s a heck of a thing after only a few days.

The second dealer is quite different than И Ю’s. General manager, А Л, is not around, and probably won’t be until after C П and I have left for Moscow. The service manager, С П-ов (please excuse, same initials...) is a soft-spoken guy who bears a passing resemblance to the singer from Nirvana. In addition, they appear to share the same taste in clothing. That in itself is pretty weird. The parts manager, A M, is also a fairly soft-spoken guy. Neither of them speak very good english at all. In fact, the only person at А Л’s dealership who speaks what I would call “good” english is T (?), whose last name and job function I failed to get today.

Beyond – and possibly contributing to -- the radically different manner of А Л’s folks is the fact that their office is more than two miles away from their shop. The office is in a set of rooms in an old Soviet-style building – that is to say, 30 years old, looking like twice that, with warped floors and everything possible made out of concrete. Horrible, in other words. I am assured that a new building is under construction and the office and shop will be located together as is customary (and proper, as far as I’m concerned...).

Because the folks at А Л’s dealership are so relatively soft-spoken, I had a bit of a hard time catching on to what they were saying. On the other hand, my crowning achievement today was telling the story of my getting this position (complete with the evening phone call letting me know that, in two days, a German would speak to me and know in a minute or two if I spoke good enough Russian for the job – and the frantic search that night for a Russian dictionary) completely in Russian, with only a couple of pauses to think of a way to talk around the words I didn’t know. It was amazing.

Then, after work, С П met up with a friend of his from Tashkent (then Tomsk – apparently, they lived near each other as kids, then went to college together), who knows the city quite well. When asked where I wanted to go, I commented on how much it would suck to have spent a whole week in S-P without ever seeing the Neva. I got a treat. Not only did I get to go in the Neva (only up to my ankles; the current is crazy-strong, and the water in this area is not terribly good for your health...), but we picked up a dinner boat up and down it a ways. Unbelievable.

Also, i learned that the local name for a main Nevskiy Prospekt bridge over a canal is Шестьдесять Яйци (Sixteen Balls), named such for the statues at each corner of a mostly nude man pulling on the reins of a horse (four corners, two figures per corner – do the math). Harharhar! I’ll put up more pictures as I can; I should go to bed soon, since this sleeping only 3 or so hours a night finally started to catch up with me as I zoned off during our initial meeting with the dealership folks (not to worry, С П assured me that I was discreet, and the meeting content really didn’t concern me anyway). I’ll try to get to posting the pictures tomorrow.

.....

By the way, since it’s already tomorrow here, happy fifth anniversary to A. We’ll make up for it next year...

Good night.

6/16 23:37, Saint-Peterburg time

This morning, I got up early enough to take a few minutes to put up some flyers. Much less painful than I expected. We’ve gotten back today early enough (the fact that it’s still today is a testament to how early!) that I’m planning to head out in the other direction again before bed. S-P is a good city for press-on advertising.

Today was the last day at И Ю’s dealership. Training went well (and И Ю, as owner / service manager, was quite attentive as today’s subject matter was claiming warranty monies back from The Company). We took another, more detailed trip around the shop - I got photos of the transmission workshop (messier than my desk has ever been; seeing it, I have to assume that they just go get a new tool every time they can’t lay their hands on the one they want. I also checked out the engine shop – much cleaner, but with a staircase steeper than a Mayan pyramid, and no handrails. It rained a fair amount today, and I got to learn (then forget, for the most part, but that’s sort of the way it goes...) the words for hail, thunder, and lightning.

All in all, it was an excellent day, language-wise. I spent a long time in discussion, 90% in Russian (with more than a couple stops for “как сказать по-русскии, слово ...”, of course) with И Ю and B E. И Ю is one hell of a businessman, with, in my opinion, a very accurate picture of the Russian environment, and a good vision for his future in it. It turns out, his dedication to American automobiles is partly personal, as he related the story of his first trip to Finland to buy a broken-down Lada for spare parts for the Lada he owned. His broke down (threw a rod, called братьку руку, which means literally “brother’s hand”, but is colloquial for a fist in the elbow, and middle finger raised) and he had to buy another on the spot to get home. This other was a МАЗ, which burned out it’s starter on the way home, then cracked it’s block on his next major trip. He proceeded to go through most of the other local brands in a similar fashion before accidentally stumbling on a Ford which served him faithfully for years. This works out well for us, since he is a leading advocate in Russia for American trucks. Regardless, we ended the day at around 21:00 after a two-hour bull session in the office cafeteria with B E, C П, and all the dealership staff. Again, almost all in Russian, and with me as an active (unlike yesterday) participant. They tell me I have some accent and word choice characteristics that make me come off as possibly Lithuanian. Hmmm. Maybe hearing labas, kuldunis, tevas, and Bubelis (among others) repeatedly in my youth imbedded something.

I took more pictures, but I’ll post and explain them later. For now, на улицу за больше рекламование!...

6/16/04 01:51, Saint-Peterburg time

I made a point to get some pictures today. Click Me

At the dealership, work went well for the first half of the day, then shortly into the second half, C P got into a “discussion” with И Ю and his main salesman, A ?. It was quite something. I understood only about half the words, and so only about ? of the concepts, but mainly used the 2 hours or so to train my ears to hear the words discretely (rather than simply ‘blahblahblahblah’, I was getting ‘blah blah business blah completely unbelievable response blah’). That’s not terrible for the third (or is it fourth?) day. This evening, I was taken out (though I (or should I say, The Company) paid) to a Kavkaz place. Georgian wine (best in the world) with Russina-quality, Ukraine/Azerbaijani food. Mmm-mm.

While we were out getting pictures before dinner, I managed to get two flyers up. No troubles with the law yet. I am assured that I will be able to play ‘dumb tourist’ and that the cops will see the flyers as no threat and let me pass. Particularly is I am able to sling a bit of Russian their way – since S-P is a popular tourist spot, they are used to the stupid type, and the attempt to show them respect will go over that much better.

Tomorrow will be the last day at И Ю’s shop. I can only hope that the rest of the dealers are as pleasant to work with. Word got out (via, I must assume, the copy of my passport I had to email to the Moscow office to get my visa) that it was my birthday, and he (or his company, what have you...) gave me a faberge egg and an amazing book about the history of S-P. There was a price tag left on an inside cover of the book; 4,000 rouble, or about $140. I’m not sure I’ve ever had a book – including textbooks, which are by no means cheap – so expensive. It’s bound and ornately covered in solid bronze (I think) with cloth hinging. Wow.

The joke for the day regarded the gifts given me. A comment was made that the shops were all out of матрёшки (the russian stacking dolls). И Ю said that was too bad, since one could easily smuggle vodka past customs inside the larger doll. This led to my composition of the word ВОДрёшКА, which the Russians found hilarious.

I noticed today that the Militia cars vary from new Mercedes’ to ancient Lada or Volga’s. I commented and was told that these are “private Militia”, and that some of them couldn’t afford the nicer cars. I’m fairly certain this was mainly a joke. Certainly there must have been some element of truth, as I can think of no other way to explain the variety of “official” autos.

6/15/04 01:11 Saint-Peterburg time

I got the phone charged up fairly painlessly. Those who have the number, feel free to call between the hours of 9:30PM and noon, Portland time, while I am still in the Moscow/S-P time zone. Please bear in mind, I am supposed to be working.

We scoped out Nevskiy Prospekt this evening about halfway down to the Winter Palace. At dinner, C П successfully hit on our waitress to the ends that she has agreed to give us a guided tour tomorrow evening (since neither of the guys I'm with are Peterburgers). That should be good; this evening was a lot of:

Me: What's / Who is / How old is that?
С П: I don't know. B?
В Е: Me neither.

Somewhat less than satisfying...

On a final note, it seems that the authorities around here aren't quite as militantly opposed to the mere existence of flyers as in Moscow. I should be able to put up quite a few this week. This will be good additonally, since S-P is a major tourist destination for Russians, particularly during the Белые Ночи. I'm still a bit nervous about being arrested for putting the flyers up, but for now, it's just making me careful. Since they're historical, lack any kind of how-to information, and are about American weapons, I suppose I could talk (hahahaha) my way out of a questioning. Still, something I want to avoid; it's made me put up fewer flyers than I would have in, say, New York.

Then again, maybe I was just in the wrong part of Moscow...

By the way (note time above) happy birthday to me. A will remind me when I get up later today exactly how old I am these days.

6/14/04 21:12, Saint-Peterburg time

Just back to the hotel on my first working day here. As expected, I’m having some problems with the computer network here (excellent quality), communicating over the high-speed data lines (!!) with the Portland office’s servers (wonder where the problem lies...). Still, progress is taking place.

И Ю’s main headquarters lies about an hour’s drive outside S-P’burg, on a heavily-potholed dirt road. The joke is that it is an excellent spot for a service center, since no one could get there without needing their suspension overhauled. He has other shops, apparently, in Moscow, Nizhny Novgorod, and Irkutsk. From his books, it looks like he’s a pretty serious player – averaging one hundred trucks sold a month. Granted these are all used, and pretty high value for their costs, but still, I anticipate that he’s going to be a major force in the introduction and penetration of American trucking into the Russian market. It also seems that he was the one who came up with the marketing angle about American trucks being designed for North American roads and weather, and thus more suitable for the Russian environment.

It was an interesting day. A K from our dealer in Saratov had also traveled up to И Ю’s dealership for our visit, since we had to knock his city off our agenda due to its lack of a major airport and our disinclination to undergo the four-hour drive from the nearest one. Today was mainly spent getting И Ю’s computer systems to interface properly with Portland’s. At the end of the day, I hand managed to synch up everything but the online service and workshop manual application. This is a pretty major one, but if we just can’t get it to move, I can probably get the information of CD’s which will immediately be out-of-date, but which will be better than nothing.

Lunch was pretty good. И Ю took the three of us, the guy from Saratov, and five of his employees to lunch at a traditional-type restaurant over by Pushkin Park. The food, as I have come to expect, was good. The drink was квас, a semi-sweet, I’m-almost-certain-alcoholic (but turned out not to be...), slightly tart, honey-containing beverage. Served warm, excellent. Also, the soup called сольянка. Also consistently good.

The joke for the day: И Ю tells me that yesterday was “Russian Independence day”. I ask “От кого?” (From who?). Laughs. Then his answer “Индепенденс Кремля от народов” (the Kremlin’s independence from the people). Huge laughs. You had to be there.

Now. time for me to go out and charge up the minutes on my Russian cell, as I got it with a mere 5 roubles (15 cents) on it, and will probably need a bit more than that. More later...

6/14/04 01:45, Saint-Peterburg time

So, here we are in Saint-Peterburg, smack-dab in the middle of the White Nights festival time, in a hotel on Невскый Проспект, just down from the Winter Palace. I go a bit of sleep on the ~1 hour plane ride over (Аэрофлот). We got back from dinner just little while ago, and my first actual day of work begins tomorrow at 7AM (so I have time to call A before breakfast).

I like S-Peterburg much more than Moscow. Moscow is interesting, and has a lot of neat history and landmarks, but S-P has similar tourist significance, plus is simply a nicer city in a nicer region. Apparently, my impression corresponds to that of most foreigners. On the drive from the hotel, I did notice a humongous statue of Lenin out front of the Institute for Military Research (Space). Not to mention, the Aeroflot logo is a hammer and sickle with pilot wings. I guess all the iconography can’t fall away at once. I did ask about the Lenin – one of his arms is out in front of him, and I cracked something about him playing baseball. В Е (who joined us in Moscow and will be with С П and I for our entire week in S-P) explained that he is “pointing the way for the people”, to which И Ю (a S-P dealer-principle, and our ride from the airport) made a snide remark that I mainly missed. Then the whole car of Russians started in on a crap-on-communist-legends kick. It was quite a ride.

6/13/04 11:00, Moscow time

Waiting for a taxi to take me to the Moscow office, I’ll scratch down some notes. Breakfast this morning was buffet-style. I sampled some of everything. Main course appeared to be raw salmon fillets (much bigger than your standard sushi slab, though a bit thinner) on toast. I had one on rye, one on white (which is different than US white, but I can’t pin down exactly in what manner). Accompanying were at least five kinds of bacon-like meats – all served cold, though smoked(?). One was definitely pig, two were probably pig, another had a gamey sort of venison taste to it, and the last was unidentifiable. All were good, though. Then, some cheeses, and finally coffee. Way strong coffee. This from someone who generally likes it strong to begin with...

Anyway, after breakfast (which itself was preceded by another call home to A and Z before bedtime), I got directions from the hotel receptionist to take the Metro downtown. the hotel is maybe fifteen minutes walk from the Сокол station, and then a twenty-five minute ride to the Театральная station. From there, maybe four blocks to the Kremlin. It was raining a bit and somewhat early, but there I was. Whoa. Yesterday was a major state holiday, so this morning, they were tearing down the stadiums and decorations in Red Square. I walked about half way around the Kremlin to an entrance by the national armory building that didn’t have a ticket counter. Then right inside I went. I made it about halfway through the complex (which is huge) to the Tsar’s Cannon when a friendly Russian struck up a chat with me. After a few minutes, I realized (as in, he told me) he was Kremlin security out of uniform, and was trying to direct me to the exit, since I was inside well before tourists were allowed inside. Oops. He walked me to one of the exits, and I made my way back to my hotel. By the time I was back at Театральная, the rain had stopped and traffic had picked up.

By the way, I brought along an envelope of TGTNW flyers and managed to stick a few of them up on the way from Сокол back to the hotel. I wouldn’t say that Moscow is clean (not by any stretch), but the evidence is that the authorities or building superintendents are strongly opposed to flyers. I had to find places that had older-looking, not-torn-off flyers before I was willing to expend one of mine. Such locations exist, but are not generally in the most heavily-trafficked places. Still, all the flyers are easily visible/readable, on trafficked routes, and mostly protected from the weather. We’ll see how this works once the orders start coming in, right?

Taxi should be here soon. More later...

6/12/04 21:05, Moscow time

Well, here I am. С П and a couple of friends (since he still lacks a car of his own...) picked me up at the airport, and we went straight from Шереметьего to my hotel -- the Best Western(?!?) Art Hotel – for the night. The flight in to Moscow was not bad; once I got to Шереметьего, however, it got all balanced out with a ~1.5 hour wait at passport control. I am assured that this is perfectly normal at Шереметьего, and that the other Russian airports are nothing at all like that. I can only hope.

Worldphone works from my hotel, so I was able to call A and talk for a bit. Very good. The week I spend in Moscow might not be as miserable as I was expecting along those lines. Right now, I’m slightly hungry and up for a stroll around the hotel grounds – oh yes, did I mention that, in Russia, you have to surrender your passport (without which you are not allowed to be on the street) at the hotel main desk when you check in? I certainly hope the hotel has a good eatery...

More tomorrow.

...

A quick note from after dinner. I went to the hotel restaurant. Looking at the hotel menu, I figured I’d try what was billed as a “traditional dish” – пельмени (с мясом) {this is pronounced “pel’meni s’ myasom”. It arrived, and surprise to me, it turns out that пельмени must be Russian for kuldunas. They brought out a bowl of them, even spiced the same way I get them from my mom. It even came with a little cup of sour cream and another cup of diced bacon. Unbelievable... Particularly since the last big-production meal I had in Portland before setting off and the first ethnic Russian meal I had upon arrival turned out to be the exact same thing.

6/12/04 12:10, Frankfurt time

Well, that was terrible. A long flight, made marginally worse by my insistence on keeping my word to get a picture of Santa’s house for Z – possible only at about the mid-way point of the flight (and assuming Santa’s place is visible from over Greenland). It was marginally neat that the clouds cleared in time for me to see some of Greenland and Iceland. What was a tiny bit neater was the fact that, since it is summer, our flight jumped right over the night of June 11/12. The sun was visible the whole time, were one to have opened a window shade.

Sadly, I have no impression of the Frankfurt airport. It’s just like every other airport I’ve ever been in. except the English announcements come second. It looks like the Moscow flight will be a bit less full than the Frankfurt one. There’s that, I suppose.

And, by the way, I did get a picture of the plane I flew in, offloading in Frankfurt. It’s white with a blue tailfin. Woop woop.

6/11/04 14:10, Portland time

PDX

At the Lufthansa terminal, about 90 minutes before my flight leaves. Hugs and kisses to A, G, and Z at the drop-off went no worse than expected, though there was and incident getting into the car to go to the airport when I accidentally shut Z’s hand in the van door. By the time we got moving, he was pretty much over the shock – and it gave me an excuse to sit in the back with him and G to squeeze out a last couple of minutes with the boys. Last night, we set up a big map of Russia on the wall in Z’s room, with all my destinations marked so he can keep track of me. At this point, all he wanted to know is what color airplane I’ll be on...

Hmm.. I have no idea. And my stupid gate lacks windows.. Grr..

I’ll have to take a quick shot of one at the Frankfurt airport, since I figure on having a bit of time there. Interesting thing about Lufthansa (to a non-seasoned international traveller such as myself, at least) is that they set a weight limit (8 kg – fine, a mass limit...) on carry-on luggage. My briefcase/laptop-and-book-porter came in just under the limit, so I was saved a hassle right off the bat. As has become my custom, I’m traveling in jeans and a polo-type shirt, with my suit coat for just that little touch of formality. The jeans and shirt are generic Costco brands, as I was advised before leaving to avoid a look that shouts out “American Business Traveler”; that is, minimize name-brand clothing and jewelry.

The Brookstone shop at PDX had the plug converter, which was the last item I needed for my trip. Unfortunately, they sell them in packs containing plugs for everywhere in the world, at 20 bucks a pop, so I couldn’t justify getting one each for my laptop and my camera.

Speaking of cameras, A went out last night and, combining all the money she and I got for our birthdays (5/25 for her; 6/15 for me) bought a digital camcorder/camera. Certainly, by the time I get into Saint-Peterburg, she’ll have it figured out and be able to post some stuff for me.

My desk area is completely packed (my department is moving while I'm out, so everything got boxed up). I've been over my Russia-related items checklist a couple of times; all seems in order. Final work-related prep was printing out for A my detailed itinerary and the list of emergency contacts maintained by The Company to initiate the ninja-based (one might presume...) rescue of an employee who finds himself in a bad spot in foreign lands.. Either rescue, or "repatriation of remains"... Joy...

That being done, all that remains is packing my bags and otherwise trying not to stress or worry, and just enjoy my time with A, Z, and G for the next 24 hours or so.

I may post again before I fly, but if not:

С Вами Поговорю в России!!

Today, put together my generic "training program" for the dealerships. Subject, of course, to major modification as necessary. Starting to pack my work-related gear. This will be my first major trip with the service department (as well as my first such with The Company), so my boss is taking particular care to ensure that I am set up and fully prepped to go. Discussion is taking place regarding setting up training for the mechanics (I'm only doing a brief systems introduction and dealer evaluation on this trip -- and not even at all of our dealers!) at our dealerships sometime in the next twelve months. I'm sort of embarrassed, as one of our vendors was way more on the ball -- has already set up a serious training program, and will have a trainer in country in a matter of weeks -- than us... My fear is that budget concerns wil preclude sending an official trainer, and that I will be tasked with the job. The initial training regime, at three weeks per dealer, will run six months or so. Fear.

At home, time with the family is getting short. G is sick with an ear, sinus, and bladder(!) infection. Z has picked up on the fact that something is impending. I brought home a big map of Russia for his wall and some post-it arrows for him to track "where is daddy?" for the next month. I'm glad I'll take Friday off (until I get to the airport, that is...). This part of the trip is going to suck something awful.

The flyers came this morning.

I now have made, on my desk, a "to bring with me" pile. It sits a mere 6" high -- plus the two boxes of push-pins that came with the flyers.
Add to this my laptop and a couple of books (yes, I intend be a total dork and bring Russian-language books to Russia. I need all the practice I can get, and it'll be a loo-oong flight. Chekhov's (Чехов) pretty good for beginning Russian; he uses such small words.) along with a digital camera, pack of training-programs-on-CD, and various business-type sundries. Plus, gifts for J V and С П. Plus - I'm sure - at least a couple of additional items I'm forgetting. Plus cords for the above various electronicals. Plus at least one power converter/adapter to juice my American goodies off Rest-of-the-World outlets.

Plus clothes. Can't forget clothes.

Packing will begin in two days...

This evening, took off from work a bit early to spend the afternoon with A. That went well. Then, over to my mom's place for dinner / birthday combined with my brother E and my sister K (June 9 and June 13, respectively). Again, went well.

We set up the bank card for the isolated account. I pulled out some US$ for bartering purposes, and bought the rubles off my boss. The flyers may have come in in the afternoon while I was out -- I'll pick them up tomorrow one way or another.

Three days and change to go...

The last weekend with the family before I go. Pretty good. Z and G were both as well behaved as can be expected of a 4 and 1.5-year old (respectively). Saturday, we were invited over to some friends' place for dinner. Z got to help A make the dessert, including running some kitchen power tools. Good times. G was really into doing stuff with me (rather than mainly going after mom, as he usually does). One of his latest things is getting into situp prep position and waiting for someone to push him over -- he's not quite up to doing the whole thing himself, but it cracks him up nonetheless. Dinner went well; the kids had a great time playing with our friends' daughter (2.5 yrs, or thereabouts...). Today we just hung around the house, did a bit of work in the garden, and mainly relaxed together. I did get a chance to make it to the part of Charlotte's Web (read out loud to Z, of course) where Charlotte dies. Happily, this means I will be certain to finish the story before leaving. Sounds like the plan is Stewart Little while I'm out.
All in all, the weekend would have been completely excellent, except A and I have 'discovered' on recent trips of mine that we get all stressed out for pretty much the entire week before I leave, and can't actually relax at all. The 'before' for this trip, while no worse than my other ones, is no better -- casting a sort of pall over the whole weekend. Four days (and change) and counting...

Also, yesterday, the isolated account bankcard showed up. I also picked up a change wallet and am buying 420р off my boss tomorrow. Really, all that's left to wait for is the nuclear weapons book flyers -- which should get to my office tomorrow. I'm practically half way there at this point.

More hurdles jumped.

My passport, with visa, arrived today. Many, many thanks again to the good folks at Zierer. Also, my lab coat (so as not to screw up my nice clothes while crawling around rusty, greasy, generally foul hunks of steel and rubber) came yesterday, along with my plane tickets. Running down the list, then:

Tickets - check
Documentation - check
Camera - check (sitting on my desk right now)
Signed travel approval forms - check
Lab coat - check
Goodies of appreciation for my Russian colleagues - check
Laptop in working order - check
Requisite software and data - check
Spare pair of glasses - check (never know when you might need them)
Pile of business cards - check
Maps - check
Trusty Russian-English/English-Russian dictionary - check

At this point, all that's left is the bankcard for my 'isolated' account, the nuclear weapons book flyers, and the waiting (and packing). seven days and counting...

My agenda is finalized enough that I feel comfortable posting it. Here we go:

All times and dates are local
June 11, ~4PM Leave Portland
June 12, ~11:30 AM Arrive Frankfurt
June 12, ~1PM Leave Frankfurt
June 12, ~6PM Arrive Moscow (note: this trip only seems really, really long. In fact, it only represents about 13.5 hours total flight time. I would only consider this to be a single-really of long time)
Hang out in Moscow for a day, then
June 13, ~7:30PM Leave Moscow
June 13, ~9PM Arrive Saint-Peterburg
June 14-19 Three days each, training at dealers in Saint-Peterburg (9AM-8PM, daily) ((Oh, by the way, somewhere on June 18, call A to wish her well on our fifth anniversary. -sigh-)
Hang out in Saint-Peterburg for almost an entire days, then
June 20, ~9PM Leave Saint-Peterburg
June 20, ~10PM Arrive Moscow
June 21-26 Three days each, training at dealers in Moscow (9AM-8PM, daily)
Hang out in Moscow for less than an entire day, then
June 27, ~3:30PM Leave Moscow
June 27, ~8PM Arrive Yekaterinburg
June 28-30 Three days training at the dealer in Yekaterinburg
July 1, ~7AM Leave Yekaterinburg
July 1, ~7:30AM Arrive Moscow
July 1, ~3PM Leave Moscow (I know, looking at a map it's unbelievable, but there are no better flights...)
July 2, ~9AM Arrive Khabarovsk
July 2, Begin training in Khabarovsk dealer (1PM-8PM -- still enough time for a full day!)
July 3, Day two of Khabarovsk dealer training (9AM-8PM)
Hang out in Khabarovsk for a full, uninterrupted day!!!
July 5, Day three of Khabarovsk dealer training (9AM-8PM)
July 6, ~9AM Leave Khabarovsk
July 6, ~10:30AM Arrive Vladivostok
July 6, Begin training at Vladivostok dealer (again with the 1PM-8PM)
July 7-9 Three more days of training at Vladivostok dealer
July 10, ~4:30PM Leave Vladivostok
July 10, ~5PM Arrive Seoul
July 10, ~6:30PM Leave Seoul
July 10, ~12:30PM Arrive Vancouver
July 10, ~3PM Leave Vancouver
July 10, ~4PM Arrive Portland (net time travel this final flight package: 30 minutes)

Holy crap. It doesn't make me feel much better to look at...

The package for my visa arrived at Zierer this morning; promptly, I was called regarding a "missing form". A brief investigation showed that the form in question (№ 95 - Supplement to the Questionaire, if it matters) was not on the Zierer website.
So. The folks there faxed it to me, I filled it out, then checked my email to discover that the form was removed from Zierer's site intentionally, as the Russian embassy no longer needs it...

My (by which I mean, the Company's -- not mine) $600 at work, I suppose.

Regardless, they claim that a person will hand-carry my app to the embassy and wait around for the visa to be issued. I am positively tingling with excitement...